best decision ever.

you know when you skip more songs than you listen to on your ipod? and it just makes your life that much worse. well. guess what i did. i deleted all of my ipod songs. and then i added ones that i actually want to listen to. and now i'm happy every time i listen to my ipod, i don't skip songs anymore, and my life sucks less. success.

pick-up lines.

at work today there was a regular customer (young guy) who said to me: "do you eat a lot of sugar?"
my first thought was: hey! i'm not that fat!
and then. i knew what was coming.
"because you're so sweet." (which, in norwegian also means cute.)
few people have mastered the art of pick-up lines. this guy..had not. needless to say, i was not impressed.
but. i have to say. that i would like a guy who actually have mastered the art.
because pick-up lines can be very charming.

a glimpse.

today i experienced a glimpse of happiness.

you know when you don't know how bad you're doing until something good happens, and you forgot that you don't feel like that anymore?

well. i was biking home from choir and thought about this girl that i used to go to school with who just wrote me on facebook and said we have a friend in common. i haven't talked to/seen her in many years, and the friend we have in common is an american who's related to her, and who served his mission in my ward. so that's the connection. not a big thing.

but as i was biking home i thought about how it's totally a missionary opportunity for me in some small way. and my heart did a microscopic skip and my emotions had the upper hand for a second, and even if i wanted to, i would not have been able to keep from smiling.

and i was happy. for a moment.

but then i was sad that i haven't felt like that in a long time. that is, happy. not overjoyed, just happy.

i realized that it's pretty bad that i am mostly unhappy, and once in a blue moon i experience a tiny glimpse of happiness.

when i experienced that today, it made me so sad. and although i treasured that glimpse as though i would never experience it again, my heart broke thinking that that's all i got. for a second.

i used to be happy most of the time. in fact, i was rarely unhappy. and always positive and optimistic. if this is what growing up is like i don't want to do it. i'll move to bali and live on the beach with no responsibilities for the rest of my life.

last night i decided that enough is enough, and that starting today i would force myself to be positive and optimistic, and then i ended up having a terrible start of the day, and it's hard to be positive and optimistic when everything seems to work against you.

but maybe that's my lot. right now. maybe that's what i am here in norway to learn. how to stay positive during the grandest trial of my life. how to stay optimistic through 98% unhappiness.

i know this sounds... i don't even know how this sounds. but i'ts how i feel. and it's a new feeling. i'm not used to being unhappy, and it's difficult to deal with. i guess you learn how to.

but i can't accept unhappiness. i have to work harder for happiness. i realize that. so i will try harder to work harder.

if you're reading this, feel free to say a little prayer for me. i'd appreciate that.

and don't misunderstand. i am capable of feeling joy and appreciation. i just currently live in a state of unhappiness. and it's due to the fact that i am not where i want to be. in most ways. physically. emotionally. spiritually (although, i feel like i am learning a great deal in this area). etc.

bottom line. today i experienced a glimpse of happiness. and for that i celebrate.

doesn't this picture just bring you a glimpse (or more) of happiness?

source. 

today was an expensive day.

recently i've been having headaches every day all day. and that gets pretty old fast. so after convincing myself that it most likely is not a brain tumor, i remembered that the last time i was getting headaches (btw. i never get headaches. like so rarely a box (it's called a box, isn't it?) of ibu-profen lasts me about ten years. needless to say, it's been torture), i needed a stronger prescription for my glasses/contacts. 

so today i went to the eye doctor, and i'm getting new glasses. frames and the whole nine yards. two frames, in fact. an extra pair for free. it took me about half the day to pick out the frames, and the doctor and the sales lady were giving me all sorts of pairs to try, and told me which ones looked too big, too small, too round, too square. they were very helpful, and i think i found the right pair.(s) it's kind of a big deal because it's something that will be right in the middle of my face for a fair amount of the time, and contrary to popular belief, 

i do not want to look like an idiot.

i got some contacts to try, and let me tell you. it's a miracle. i can see again. and i gotta say: i am much better looking than i thought i was. granted, the glasses were cheaper than expected, but i just bought new glasses, people, so naturally it's gonna cost a bit.

a few hours after the much needed eye doctor appointment came a much more needed appointment. i went somewhere i have not been since i was still a teen-ager. 

the dentist.

a word of advice. do not wait 6+ years to go to the dentist. i mean, it could be worse, but it was to me. at least worse than i expected. i figured that maybe i had a couple of cavities in need of attention, but no big deal. and maybe it's not a big deal to some people. but i have 8 cavities in need of attention, and two wisdom teeth to pull. yup. my worst fear. next to being attacked by a tick. and of course excluding dying, or having a close one die. 

and i have pretty nice teeth. they're not too yellow. and they're pretty straight. and i can't really see any cavities when i open my mouth. and i brush, floss, and use mouthwash every single day. 

still. that's what you get for not going to the dentist in a 1/5 of your life. but it's all good. i just want to take care of it. get it done. and i've never had a cavity before, so i guess it's a first for everything. getting fillings. part of being a grown-up. i guess. 

so. almost $3000 later. i will have a healthy mouth, see, and look hot. 

life is great. i guess.

fave.

october is my favorite month. let me tell you why.

1. fall is at its' peak. aka its' bestest. and fall is my fave season.
2. colorful leaves. warms the soul.
3. crisp air. nothing better. and crisp is really the perfect word for fall air.
4. rain. (sometimes - not every.single.day.)
5. the word october is just sexy. ahk-toh-burr. just taste it. mmm.
6. halloween. the greatest holiday of all. costumes. scary stuff. fun food. hot boys. (always.)
7. october is orange. and orange is my favorite color.
8. scarves.
9. pumpkin. spice. and all the fun to be had w those.

please never end, october.

source  .  source  .  source  .  source

side note I: i used to want to get married in october, but decided that august makes the most sense. obviously.

side note II: my beautiful pinterest board has some delicious fall pics.